Still revising Heart on Fire. I can’t even tell you how frustrated I am with tearing apart my hard work and piecing it back together this time around. I’m beginning to understand why some just charge through their first draft like a bull in a china shop – must. get. to. end. – and not even worry about details the first time around. It certainly seems like that might be the way to go, however there’s one tiny problem – my pea brain doesn’t seem to work that way. My process is clunky. I have to read/re-read as I go, layering in things that occurred to me while I was sleeping or driving or grocery shopping – I have to get those things OUT while they’re fresh, before I forget. I try not to waste too much time polishing sentences at the layering stage, but inevitably, I do alot of pre-editing. This wasn’t so much of a problem with my first four novels – I suspect this is what’s meant by “honing your skills” – you realize what parts of your process are clunky and need refining. And you also realize what you will probably always suck at. Can I accept that I suck at writing in small chunks? That I need a block of 3-4 hours to feel satisified with whatever progress I’ve made for a day? Now that I’m back to work, what if I never find a 3-4 hour block of time again? No, no, and no! I have to find the time, if not every day, then at least a few times a week. My kids have athletic practices almost every night during the school year, and while I want to be there for them, I get some of the best revision ideas during those times, ideas I’ve tried scribbling down on a notepad, but when I come back to them – they make little sense to me and the moment to integrate them into the story has evaporated. There’s an hour and a half a day I could be writing… if only I had one of those mini-laptops that I could stick in my purse.
Of course the fact that our home office is still under construction doesn’t help. So I’m writing on the living room couch with the kids watching TV, the birds squawking, the laundry piling up all around me, and ugh. No offense to hubby, he’s doing all he can, but it’s just not a very productive atmosphere. In the spirit of the room is almost done, we now have four walls and a ceiling and all new windows and electrical in there…
We also have my new desk sitting here in the living room. Okay, so it’s technically ours, we both really love it, but I saw it first! Can you see it’s kidney-shaped? It’s going to look really pretty with what else I want to do in there. (Notice Jupiter on the floor giving it his seal of approval. His comfort is very important to me, because if he isn’t comfy, he bites my feet when I’m writing, so I’m thrilled he likes it.)
And last but not least, this is the super cute mini chandelier we’re ordering from a little boutique in Portland.
Fussy? Sure. But since the point of redoing the office was to reverse the nasty feng shui in there, we decided to go all in. The office is where we handle our bills – and where I hope to actually make some money with my writing. Our office also happens to be in the wealth/prosperity gua of our house. If there’s one area of the house that should make you feel pampered, this is it, so that’s what we’re trying to do. It’s a small bedroom, so everything has to be on a small scale, but when it’s done, I want everything in there to reflect success and to make me feel like I’ve “made” it.
So hubby is off to Home Depot today for some mudding and taping supplies, and I’m back to deconstructing HOF. I hope I can get another chapter rearranged today. I hope.
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